When the going gets tough

If you’ve been looking for a new role for a few weeks or months, there often comes a time when the going gets tough 😩

If you’re in a career transition, you’re likely to feel a lot of internal and external pressure to keep going so you can land a job as soon as possible.

This is something I went through following a sudden midlife layoff years ago.

I don’t talk much about what it was like emotionally to spend an entire year job searching…

But maybe sharing this can help you if you’re in it right now.

The sudden layoff came without a big severance check, with no emergency savings set aside, and no spouse to support me financially through months of job search.

I started my search right away. Landed just 1 interview in the first 6 months.

So how did I keep going for another 6 months?

I had to learn to manage the emotional roller coaster.

That didn’t mean stuffing negative emotions down and pretending everything was ok.

It didn’t mean chanting positive affirmations all day.

No. It meant learning how to process the emotions.

Allow them.

Feel them.

Even when it felt downright awful.

I realize this in no way sounds appealing to do!

The weird thing is that processing these emotions didn’t always take as much time as I thought.

Got yet another rejection email from a company I wanted to work for?

Let me go ahead and name that feeling, process that emotion, the rejection, feeling of loss, and disappointment for what could have been my next role.

Strangely, that usually created a bit of relief.

Resisting allowing the emotion actually made it worse.

Same with trying to slap a positivity bandaid on an open emotional wound.

Once I allowed myself to process the negative emotion, I noticed it didn’t take very long.

And over the long run, it allowed me to take the actions that eventually led to multiple job offers.

In addition to processing and regulating my emotions, I leaned into things that brought me peace.

Like developing a spiritual practice and leaning into my support from friends and family.

Learning new things that brought me joy.

Spending time on projects that fulfilled my creative urges.

Did I wish it didn’t take a year to land a new role? Absolutely!

In the end, I landed that perfect for me role that matched exactly what I needed at that time in my career.

And, it allowed me to move forward with projects that I never made the time for before.

When the going gets tough, keep going but first tend to those emotions.

Amp up self-care and empathy for yourself, for the challenges it all brings.

Then and only then can you truly keep going.

Sending your warm virtual hugs,

Danielle